Query any jokes you want.

Best Dad Jokes to Open a Flirty Conversation

1 If I asked you to go out with me,Would your answer be the same as your answer to this question?
2 Are you google?Because you’re everything I’m searching for.
3 What’s the difference between a Ferrari and an erection?I don’t have a Ferrari.
4 Are you trash?Because I wanna take you out.
5 My love for you is like diarrhea,I can’t hold it in.
6 Are you my appendix?Because I don’t understand how you work, but this feeling in my stomach makes me want to take you out.
7 How do you make a hormone?Put lithium batteries in her vibrator.
8 Hey baby, think you can handle 12 inches?(after she looks at you in disgust) Well you’re in luck, I’m only packing 5.
9 Good thing I have my library card,Because I’m checking you out.
10 There are only 24 letters in the alphabet,I keep missing u and don’t know y.
11 Are you a good test score?Cause I wanna take you home and brag about you!
12 You remind me of a championship Bass.I don’t know whether to mount you or eat you.
13 Is your name homework?Cause I’m not doing you but I should be.
14 I’ll admit it, I have a tremendous sex drive.After all, you live 20 miles away.
15 Are you medusa?Cause I’m rock hard.
16 What’s the speed limit of sex?68 cause at 69 you have to turn around.
17 I’m no weatherman,But you can expect 2 inches tonight.
18 I don’t know if you’re in my range,But I’d sure like to take you back to my domain.
19 Are you the Gulf of Mexico?Because I wanna drill you & make a huge mess.
20 Do you know what the difference is between sex and a grilled cheese sandwich?No? Well, let’s have lunch tomorrow.
21 Hey girl, have you heard about the big sale in my bedroom tonight?Clothes are 100% off!
22 Girl, are you sitting on that F5 key?Because that a** is refreshing.
23 Can I follow you home?Cause my parents always told me to follow my dreams.
24 Are you a squirrel?Cause I want to bust a nut in your mouth.
25 Hey, what has forty-two teeth and holds back Godzilla?My zipper.
26 Hey girl, is your dad in jail?Because if I were him, I would be.
27 I heard you were looking for a stud.I got the STD, all I need is U.
28 Do you like escape rooms?I’ve got one in my basement nobody’s been able to get out of yet.
29 Are you a doctor?Because you just cured my erectile dysfunction.
30 Damn girl, are you a piñata?Because I’m gonna need a blindfold to hit that.
31 Are you an American high school?Cause I wanna shoot some kids inside you.
32 Hey, are you an interest rate?Because I’d love to Compound you.
33 Do you work for UPS?I thought I saw you checking out my package.
34 Have you ever entered a donkey in a contest?Cause you’ve got an award winning a**.
35 How do you like your eggs in the morning?Fertilized?!
36 Are you the Korean peninsula?Because I’m gonna split you in two.
37 I haven’t jerked off in almost a monthI guess you can say I haven’t been feeling myself lately!
38 Are you allergic to nuts?No? Then why do you keep spitting them out?!
39 Damn girl, are you a haunted house?Because I’m scared to come inside you.
40 Are you a water balloonBecause I wanna fill you with liquid.
41 Girl, are you a barbeque?Cause I’d slap my meat all over your grill!
42 Hey girl, are you a cop?Because you’ve taken my breath away.
43 Hey, are you a basketball?Because I want to bounce you up and down this hard wood.
44 Are you a Chinese restaurant?Because I have seen my cat in 3 days and I have a feeling I am gonna be eating that pu**y.
45 Dang girl, Are you part of a Ponzi scheme?Because something smells fishy.
46 Hey girl are you my son?Cause I can see myself in you.
47 Is your name Clause?Cause you got Mrs. written all over you.
48 Wanna be my roller coaster?The faster I go the louder you scream.
49 How much does a polar bear weigh?Enough to break the ice.
50 Do you believe in love at first sight,Or do I have to walk by you one more time?!
51 Hey boy, are you made of beryllium, gold, and titanium?Because you are be-au-ti-ful.
52 Is that a mirror in your pocketBecause I can see myself in your pants.
53 You must be so tired,Because you’ve been running through my mind all day.
54 Are you a drill sergeant?Because you have my privates standing at attention.
55 Are you a traffic ticket?Because I picked you up on the street and I can’t afford to pay you.
56 Hi, my name is Microsoft.Do you mind if I crash at your place?
57 Hello, are you lactose intolerant?Just wanted to make sure, my pickup line is very cheesy.
58 Is that a mirror in your pocket?Cause I can see myself in your pants!
59 Are you a highway?Cause I want to ride you all night long.
60 Hey boy, do you want to commit a sin for your next confessional?
61 Are you Dracula?You looked a little thirsty when you were looking at me.
62 Do I have to sign for your package?
63 Are you a trampoline?Because I want to bounce on you.
64 Am I your TV?Because you always turn me on!
65 I was recently asked, “What’s your favorite sex position?”I said, “The Zombie, I just lie-down and get eaten.”
66 Is buttcheeks one word?Or should I spread them apart?!