| 1 |
You are the new CIEIO. |
| 2 |
Now you have stable Wi-Fi. |
| 3 |
A tractor. |
| 4 |
When mother nature makes it rain. |
| 5 |
They charged him with attempted murder. |
| 6 |
He is a keeper. |
| 7 |
Because the corn has ears, the potatoes have eyes and the beans stalk. |
| 8 |
A nearm. |
| 9 |
The cornier the better. |
| 10 |
At a Farm-acy. |
| 11 |
Bison-tennial. |
| 12 |
The other says, “I am a big metal fan.” |
| 13 |
Because of his erratic behaviour. He was a danger to himself and udders. |
| 14 |
He ain’t a Freud of no goats. |
| 15 |
It was a really unfortunate churn of events. |
| 16 |
When you start hearing Honeydew this, Honeydew that. |
| 17 |
A milk sheikh. |
| 18 |
In the end, they were arrested for disturbing the peas. |
| 19 |
They’re noisy neigh-bors. |
| 20 |
A transfarmer. |
| 21 |
The steaks have never been higher |
| 22 |
Not sure if they buried it too deep, or too far apart. |
| 23 |
He was sick of him horsing around. |
| 24 |
Father: Wow, that’s a real cash cow. |
| 25 |
A magician should do the trick. |
| 26 |
jpig. |
| 27 |
It was a cool ranch. |
| 28 |
One more and you’ll have to start collecting rent. |
| 29 |
They become a branch manager. |
| 30 |
“Here’s your chicken,” the farmer said. |
| 31 |
It’s a small-scale operation. |
| 32 |
Chicken tenders. |
| 33 |
Not farmer but protractor. |
| 34 |
A chicken, bacon, ranch. |
| 35 |
Mute ants. |
| 36 |
The farmer looks her in the eyes tearing up and says, “I’m an ex tractor fan.” |
| 37 |
It soiled itself. |
| 38 |
It’s from the Dairy Air. |
| 39 |
A poultry-geist. |
| 40 |
Brown chicken, brown cow. |
| 41 |
To be promoted from a farm hand to a farm assist. |
| 42 |
Cowculus. |
| 43 |
“Ah, yes,” the Englishman said, nodding in agreement. “I used to own a truck like that.” |
| 44 |
A farm animal in a real baaaad moooood. |
| 45 |
Dam it. |
| 46 |
Because they are always looking for a needle in a haystack. |
| 47 |
A hoe. |
| 48 |
A bumper crop. |
| 49 |
A few moments later, there is a knock at the door. It’s the cow and the pig. |
| 50 |
They heard the farmer had sick beets. |
| 51 |
Because they’re all such a boar. |
| 52 |
Reported it as grain larceny. |
| 53 |
A lot of today’s teens look better as farm animals. |
| 54 |
Vegetables. |
| 55 |
Farmer: Because he lies! He’s never done any of those things! |
| 56 |
There wasn’t mush-room to grow there. |
| 57 |
The Autobarn. |
| 58 |
Sell farm. |
| 59 |
In ma farm. |
| 60 |
They said it was A-maize-ing. |
| 61 |
This irritates the officer, who exclaims, “Do you see this god damn badge son?! This badge means I can go wherever I want, when I want, and how I want! When it comes to telling me where the f*ck I can go, you have no authority! Have I made my point, boy?!” |
| 62 |
A cattle-pult. |
| 63 |
Like walking on eggshells. |
| 64 |
Guac-a-doodle-doo. |
| 65 |
I mist you. |
| 66 |
It was a little hoarse. |
| 67 |
“Well, he can have all of my cows, I’m just making sure he knows I’m a bull!” says the youngest one. |
| 68 |
Bees, the means of production. |
| 69 |
It’s pretty hare raising. |
| 70 |
“Bees till my beating heart.” |
| 71 |
Makes sod. |
| 72 |
They both become hostile when you rearrange their letters. |
| 73 |
The farmer threw down his tools, ran to the fence and screamed at the top of my lungs,“Your badge, agent! Show him your f*ckin badge!” |
| 74 |
A humblebee. |
| 75 |
He didn’t give a crop. |
| 76 |
He could barley wheat for his crops to come in. |
| 77 |
A crop top. |
| 78 |
Foster farms. |
| 79 |
“You said there were no officers in my neighbourhood.” |
| 80 |
Cowboom. |
| 81 |
Agriculture. |
| 82 |
Kernel. |
| 83 |
Too many stalkers. |
| 84 |
“….you see!” said the husband to his wife. |
| 85 |
Because it enjoys breaking it down. |
| 86 |
Step 2: Fertilizer |
| 87 |
Entremanure. |
| 88 |
Because the soil had no humus. |
| 89 |
“I don’t know man, there are so many fields to choose from.” |
| 90 |
It allows you to work in a variety of fields. |
| 91 |
Shit’s gone up! |
| 92 |
Barns and no-bulls. |
| 93 |
Holding the bucket up he said, “I’m here to feed the alligator…” |
| 94 |
What a surprising turnip event. |
| 95 |
A shitstorm. |
| 96 |
Livestocks. |
| 97 |
“But you only f*ck one goat….” |
| 98 |
Because they always find a job in their field. |
| 99 |
Cumpost. |
| 100 |
A doody duty |
| 101 |
“The cow didn’t.” |
| 102 |
Because it’s like casting swirls before pines. |
| 103 |
An agriculture. |
| 104 |
Because he had a shitpost. |
| 105 |
“That f*cking sheep is a liar!” |
| 106 |
Because they’re part of the agro-culture. |
| 107 |
What a load of crap! |
| 108 |
You have to make doo. |
| 109 |
By it’s furrowed plow. |
| 110 |
“This is the fourth gay rooster I’ve purchased this month!!” |
| 111 |
A Mos-cow. |
| 112 |
They kept garnishing his paycheck. |
| 113 |
When he drops the beet. |
| 114 |
“My wife then walks into the barn and sees me standing behind old Dottie. Now, if you can try and convince my wife that I was only trying to milk that cow, I’ll buy one of your tractors.” |
| 115 |
Cause all they do is graze. |
| 116 |
To get some fresh beets. |
| 117 |
It made bale. |
| 118 |
“I thought you’d never ask,” the farmer responds. “I also got her pregnant!” |
| 119 |
The Plow. |
| 120 |
Christian Bale. |
| 121 |
The elderly lady responded, “ Place the goose on the ground, cover him with the bucket, place the paint on top of the bucket, and I’ll hold the chickens.” |
| 122 |
GI GI Joe. |
| 123 |
Hay! |
| 124 |
The farmer dropped his head as if he were ashamed. After a few seconds, he looked up timidly and said, “I got lost once…” |
| 125 |
A chicken coup. |
| 126 |
A bulldozer. |
| 127 |
Moral: If you’re hung like a horse, you don’t need a BMW to pick up chicks. |
| 128 |
A lawnmooer. |
| 129 |
With a cowculator. |
| 130 |
Doodle blinks open one eye, winks, and nods to the sky, saying, “Shhh, they’re getting closer.” |
| 131 |
The Corner. |
| 132 |
Grains…! |
| 133 |
Seeing the puzzled look on the doctor’s face, he continued, “You know he didn’t get up there by himself, he doesn’t belong up there, he doesn’t know what to do while up there, he’s elevated beyond his ability to function, and you just wonder what kind of dumb arse put him there, to begin with.” |
| 134 |
A pesticide. |
| 135 |
It was inGRAINed in his DNA. |
| 136 |
“Chicken Farmer it is.” |
| 137 |
He would be an ex-terminator. |
| 138 |
They all like a good grain. |