| 1 |
What is a pirate’s favorite element in the periodic table?Gold. Why would a pirate need Argon?! |
| 2 |
Did you hear about Kim’s favorite element in the periodic table?It is ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQSTUVWXYZ or, as it’s also known, R gone. |
| 3 |
What’s another name for the Periodic Table of elements?The atoms family. |
| 4 |
Why did Chuck Norris destroy the periodic table?Because Chuck Norris only recognizes the element of surprise. |
| 5 |
Which element of the Periodic Table is the poorest?Antimony. |
| 6 |
Did you hear that a man recently died after a periodic table display fell on him?The official cause of death was, “Exposure to the Elements.” |
| 7 |
Why is finding a place to sit can be a challenge in the Chemistry Department cafeteria?They only have periodic tables. |
| 8 |
What did Gold say to the periodic table?“Hey you!” |
| 9 |
A world-renowned chemist has passed away.His will specifies that all of his favorite elements from the periodic table be put in his body.“Are we really going to put a bunch of elements in his casket?” they ask his wife.To which she replies, “No, just Barium.” |
| 10 |
Did you know that we had a lot of jokes about the periodic table?But sadly all the good ones argon. |
| 11 |
What do you call a table with dots all over it?The periodic table! |
| 12 |
Did you hear about the girl who auditioned for a musical about the periodic table?She got the lead role! |
| 13 |
What does AH stand for in the Periodic Table?The Element of Surprise. |
| 14 |
What do you call a periodic table when the gold is missing?Au revoir. |
| 15 |
Why is it never a good idea to steal a periodic table?Coppers always Cu. |
| 16 |
The periodic table says it’s Bi!But that’s none of our bismuth. |
| 17 |
What’s a weeb’s favorite element on the periodic table?Manganese. |
| 18 |
What’s the stupidest element on the periodic table?Silicon. |
| 19 |
The police knock on the door of the house owned by the Periodic Table.“We’ve been told there is a strong smell of marijuana coming from your residence, sir,” said the officer.“I must say whoever called you to say that must be playing some strange game. I do not partake in drug use, gents.”“Very well,” said the second officer. “May we search your person?”“You won’t find a J on me,” said the Periodic Table. |
| 20 |
What do waitresses and chemists have in common?They both need to check the table periodically. |
| 21 |
Have you heard the joke about the periodic table?It’s Oxygen Potassium. |
| 22 |
What did the scientist say when he found two helium atoms?“He-He!” |
| 23 |
If you ever encounter an evil witch, why should you show them the periodic table?They’re good at chemistry. |
| 24 |
What is the acid of the periodic table?IO4. |
| 25 |
Which element on the periodic table is best at concealing itself?Hydrogen. |
| 26 |
What is Chris Hemsworth’s favorite element on the periodic table?Thorium. |
| 27 |
What is Michael Jackson’s favorite element in the periodic table?He Helium. |
| 28 |
What do you call a tricky woman whose initials are P.B.?Miss Lead! |
| 29 |
Where does the periodic table go on Sundays?Mass! |
| 30 |
What is the only element on the periodic table that has a gender?Helium. |
| 31 |
What is Santa’s favorite element in the periodic table?Ho Ho Ho. |
| 32 |
How do two scientists break the ice?One of them says, “U and I are on the periodic table.” |
| 33 |
What element on the periodic table is the tastiest?Tongue-sten. |
| 34 |
What do you call a restaurant patio that’s only open sometimes?A periodic table. |
| 35 |
What do you call a periodic table with elements after 118?Theoriodic Table Of Elements. |
| 36 |
What piece of furniture does a chemist who dabbles in carpentry make?Periodic tables. |
| 37 |
What did Silver say to Gold at the Periodic Table reunion?“A, U!” |
| 38 |
Why was the periodic table of elements so wrinkly?No iron. |
| 39 |
When and where do chemists make love?Periodically, on the table. |
| 40 |
Why did the chemist hang up periodic table posters everywhere?It made him feel like he was in his element. |