| 1 |
Why can’t the penguins jump higher?Where they live, they have shorter springs! |
| 2 |
How can you tell the difference between spring rolls and summer rolls?By their seasoning. |
| 3 |
Knock, knock.(Who’s there?)Althea.(Althea who?)Althea later, spring is here now! |
| 4 |
Why do bees have sticky hair in the spring?Because they use honeycombs! |
| 5 |
I accidentally planted the wrong flowers in my garden.Oopsie daisies. |
| 6 |
What’s the best part about clown college spring break?Everybody can go to Daytona Beach in one car. |
| 7 |
How do you know when spring’s here?When the leafs are out! |
| 8 |
How do trees feel in the spring?Releaved. |
| 9 |
God initially planned to use wasps to pollinate flowers.But in the end, he went with plan Bee. |
| 10 |
What happens to winter fat?It becomes spring rolls! |
| 11 |
Did you hear about the two-bed bugs that met in the mattress?They were married in the spring! |
| 12 |
Where do flowers go when they get pollinated too early in the spring?Plant parenthood. |
| 13 |
Why doesn’t Conor McGregor like fighting in the spring?Because of Mayweather. |
| 14 |
Knock, knock.(Who’s there?)Avery.(Avery who?)Avery happy spring to you! |
| 15 |
Who is the only Irishman that comes out in the Spring?Patty O’Furniture. |
| 16 |
What did the excited gardener do when spring finally came?He wet his plants. |
| 17 |
Why do doctors hate popular Instagram accounts that only post in the spring?Because they’re seasonal influencers! |
| 18 |
What does the writer suffer from each spring?A case of allegories. |
| 19 |
Four high school males missed morning lessons due to spring sickness.They informed the teacher after lunch that they had a flat tire.“Well, you skipped an exam today, so pull chairs apart and take out a piece of paper,” she replied, much to their relief.She waited for them to seat down, still smiling.“First question: which tire was flat?” she asked. |
| 20 |
Why can’t you trust math teachers in the springtime?Because they’ll always play matrix on you. |
| 21 |
What do trees in early spring, and shitty dads, have in common?They’ll both soon be leaving. |
| 22 |
Knock, knock.(Who’s there?)Alpaca.(Alpaca who?)Alpaca the spring clothes, it’s time to say goodbye to winter coats! |
| 23 |
What is a mattress’ favorite season?Spring. |
| 24 |
Did you hear about the pregnant bedbug?She’s having a baby in the spring. |
| 25 |
How do you get water into a watermelon?You plant it…in the spring! |
| 26 |
If Green = Spring, Red = Summer, Orange = Autumn, and Blue = Winter, which colour is the wettest?The Spring-colour. |
| 27 |
Why doesn’t Mrs. Clause like to go outside in spring?Because of all the rain, dear. |
| 28 |
Knock, knock.(Who’s there?)Boo.(Boo who?)Don’t cry, it’s just April showers bringing May flowers! |
| 29 |
What do you call an emergency in the spring?May day. |
| 30 |
Why didn’t the man want a spring mattress?Because it was still winter. |
| 31 |
What does a student do with his snowblower in the spring?He summarizes it. |
| 32 |
What did god say to the polar bears when they told him they hate spring and summer?Well, they can’t all be winters. |
| 33 |
Why did all the Mexican girls get pregnant on spring break?Their teacher told them to go home and do two essays. |
| 34 |
What season bounces around?Spring. |
| 35 |
Why did the mathematician hate spring?He had algebries. |
| 36 |
What’s a three-season bed?One without a spring. |
| 37 |
Knock, knock.(Who’s there?)Harry.(Harry who?)Harry up and let’s go outside to enjoy the beautiful spring weather! |
| 38 |
What is the spring’s favorite kind of pickles?Daffo-dills. |
| 39 |
It can rain cats and dogs all spring, but when does it rain monkeys?In Ape-ril. |
| 40 |
What do you call a melted snowman?Water. |
| 41 |
Why do birds sing in the spring?Because in the fall they forgot the words! |
| 42 |
What do you name a bear who gets caught in spring rain?A drizzly bear. |
| 43 |
Which superhero enjoys the spring season the most?Robin. |
| 44 |
How can you know if spring flowers are friendly?They always have new buds. |
| 45 |
Knock, knock.(Who’s there?)Robin.(Robin who?)Robin the piggy bank to buy some spring flowers! |
| 46 |
What did summer have to say to spring?“Help! I’m going to fall.” |
| 47 |
Why is spring an excellent time to start a gardening business?Because it’s the season when you can really “rake” in the cash! |
| 48 |
What is Spring’s favorite appetizer?A bloomin’ onion! |
| 49 |
How can you tell the days are getting warmer?There’s a spring in people’s step. |
| 50 |
What’s the difference between an egg in March and an egg in April?One is spring loaded and the other is not! |
| 51 |
Knock, knock.(Who’s there?)Cuck(Cuck who?)Is it spring already. |
| 52 |
What is the ideal time to jump on a trampoline?Spring time. |
| 53 |
Why are trees very forgiving?Because in the Fall they ‘Let It Go’ and in the Spring they ‘turn over a new leaf.’ |
| 54 |
Why did the baseball team love the spring season?Because it’s a time for spring training! |
| 55 |
Why was the computer cold in the spring?Because it left its Windows open! |
| 56 |
Why did the duck cross the road in the spring?To prove he wasn’t chicken! |
| 57 |
Knock, knock.(Who’s there?)Bee.(Bee who?)Bee-ware, the bees are buzzing and the flowers are blooming in spring! |
| 58 |
Why do blondes give more head in spring?They’ve heard that one swallow doesn’t make a summer. |
| 59 |
Why is a spring rain like your ex-boyfriend?It doesn’t last long and barely gets you wet! |
| 60 |
What are college students going to do between their fall courses and their spring courses?Hook up for inter-courses. |